Over the last few days, I’ve been caught up with things outside of my fitness life that needed my full attention. Over last weekend, I spent a couple of days up in Bellingham, Washington where I went for a job interview and to scope out the town as a potential place for me to land. I loved it, and thankfully, I brought my bike with me so I could tool around town and get a feel for where the neighborhoods were in relation to downtown and the amenities I might want if I were to move there.
The job interview was a flop, but I had a bit of an epiphany. I was staying on the couch of a person who was gracious enough to let me crash at their place, and upon waking, I had to go by a full length mirror. I haven’t actually stopped to see myself in a mirror like that in a long time because I’m usually just disappointed with what I saw. On that morning, though, I saw progress. I saw my body taking on a new form. Subtly. It wasn’t a giant shift and it wasn’t like BAM muscles and a tight ass. No, it was a distinct ripple of muscle in my thigh. It was a tightness across my chest. It was a definition of something around my hips. It was glimpses of what is underneath the cellulite that I’ve been carrying around for too long.
Yesterday, I took a short run. I haven’t been running much because of my damn toe, but after yesterday, I think I’m back at it. The toe was sore, but not overly so, when I was done, and I think I can push it a little harder. Amazingly, I am still able to go at a pretty good clip despite nearly two weeks of limping around wishing I could just GET OUT THERE.
Today, I made it back to the gym again. My local community center remains closed for a few more days, so I got to tackle a four-mile bike ride before getting to the next nearest center with a fitness room. More cardio and more upper body resistance training, and I feel good. Really good. I snapped a photo of myself to capture where I was and how I was coming along.
I also reached out to a good friend of mine who was a really big influence on me and fitness when we first met, and continues to be such a really good supporter of my goals. I think about him often, and his support, and so I let him know. I told him that I’m feeling kind of addicted to exercise, and I know when I need to work out. My body is craving it. He told me he deeply understood that, and was himself getting back into a fitness program, and could feel that addiction too. He also said how proud of me he was, and that he really liked how this time I’m doing this all for myself.
I couldn’t agree more. Achieving fitness for myself, setting long-range goals that include “seeing where I end up,” and really not trying to follow anyone else’s lead has done just what I need it to do. I’m more confident (especially at a time when it seems everything else around me is going to shit), I feel better emotionally, and physically, and I’m able to look at myself in a mirror of any size and see something that I like.